Is it wrongside looking up? Or is it two old men arguing about string beans and wormholes?

Sorry, no. But you were warm, and so was she. I stole that joke from Groucho Marx, yet I failed to get a proper 70s detective jacket. Mine is soft and plush, like Orson Welles after a Swedish airbath.

That's a photo of actual library graffiti. You can see more in my Flickr feed, or you can be a real person with actual things to do. The point is, I'm still paying attention to this journal.

But the other plan is still bubbling. The one with thing and stuff. Not that the other plan would have me stop attention-paying. I pay so much, I have attention-headaches.

There's my argument: restrict immigration. That's two jokes I owe Groucho.

A New Hope


Can U DIg It?

* * *

I consciously decided to refrain from running these ad scans in the One In The Hand Dept. But I can't say it wasn't close.

* * *
And The Wheel Goes Round


So this, uh, 1976 episode of Saturday Night Live I have on in the background here? They're making Swine Flu vaccine jokes. Granted, it's with the South American Killer Bees, but still. Black Iron Prison, man.

Yer Blues

"For our hero it is this, not a close shave with a bunch of Daleks, that is the ultimate terror. It is entirely fitting that the second Doctor, who more than any of his counterparts was pitted against the meaning of monstrousness, should be brought to his knees not by an army of Ice Warriors or Cybermen but by the evil that men do. His downfall is the reality of the essential difference which originally separated him from his own people. His forfeit is to live among humanity. The death of Troughton's Doctor seems also to be his ultimate triumph.'' [emphasis mine]
- BBC Episode Guide

* * *
THE TERRIBLE LIGHTNESS OF WINSTON LEGTHIGH

I Eventually Time Travel, Evidence #38


Paperback Wonder

* * *
Are there lower-case numbers?

Haunted And Hunted


* * *
Yep. That's pretty much how I think.

One In The Hand Dept.


Once Again, Just So Much Going On Here

* * *
They Called Him Ripple-Rubber

Seriously, in 1926, the L.E. Waterman Company invented Santa-Pirate Slash. Look at that grin!

* * *

I would say I was generally unimpressed with the quality of the (majority of) comics I finally caught up with this week. I hope to restore balance by jumping face first into R. Crumb's Book of Genesis. Duh-rool, duh-rool.

Two In The Hands Dept.


"It's the good life; taste it!"

* * *
Here's Where It Gets Creepy Dept.


Gaze into the third eye of the Dragon and wish.

* * *

I know I'm worth nothing without you.

I think the restaurant is setting me up. It's difficult to read this as anything but sarcasm.

One In The Hand Dept.


"It is larger than the ordinary fountain pen and holds a much greater supply of ink."

* * *

This is before all those Enzyte ads, so go figure.

* * *

That thing is still brewin'. Yuss.

Way of the Dragon.

One In The Hand Dept.


It ain't Elves..

* * *
Took me a while to get my own joke/reference, there. Look to your Coen Bros. texts, then consider what Men want v. glossy fey.

One In The Hand Dept.


Let those who worship writer's block
Beware my power.... Black Fountain's... erm, Penmanship!

* * *

Viz.

* * *

I swear I'm not doing it on purpose.

This is about pens, right?

One In The Hand Dept.


Examine my nib, Watson.

* * *

Why did America fail to heed the corporate-excess warnings of such important films as Pootie Tang and Josie and the Pussycats? Goddamn Cassandras.

I mean really. If you're going to be cursed with the gift of prophecy, yet no one will ever believe you... LEARN TO LIE.

* * *
Chinois

Beautiful pens beg to be used.

One In The Hand Dept.


Hold On Loosely

* * *

I'm the sheriff of this here ghost town.

One In The Hand Dept.


Collegiate Sinners: They Wrote What They Dared Not Say!

* * *
I love the ink stains on my fingers.

One In The Hand Dept.

BECAUSE.

* * *

There's just so much going on in that ad.

Forget it, Jake. It's October Country.

* * *

Hum Along If You Know It

WHAT SNOW WHITE REMEMBERS:

THE HUNTSMAN

THE FOREST

THE STEAMING KNIFE

-Donald Barthelme, Snow White

I just took out the notebook with the pocket into which this was tucked, for safety's sake, that day.